President Bush Reminds America, “Be Afraid, Be Very Afraid…”

President Bush spoke from the cuff today, and let America know that Al-Qaida is Hell bent on killing any and all Americans.

This is quite a turn for President Bush as he and his Administration rarely use Fear Mongering to garner support.

The Press expressed shock and dismay at this change of tactics by President Bush, and rightfully so.

Where is that good Old Common Sense and Logic we’ve all grown accustomed to hearing from Bush and his team of 25 year old Experts?

I, personally, am thoroughly disappointed with President Bush and his obvious catering to the innate Irrational Fear lurking in the hearts of all men, and even some women.

If we can’t count on him to be steadfast and resolute, on whom can we count? The Liberal Media? The Intelligence Experts? Al Sharpton?

Sure Reports say that our war in Iraq actually increased support worldwide for Al-Qaida, and that Al-Qaida despite our best efforts is every bit as strong as they were 6 years ago. But we all know that’s a load of horse shit, and how do we know? We know because President Bush told us so, and he’s a “God Loving” type dude that rarely, if ever, exaggerates or lies.

But today, Bush pulled out the “Fear Card” (Seriously he had a card that said “FEAR” in BIG RED BOLD LETTERS) and now he’s joined the ranks of such notorious “Fear Mongers” as… well, anyone who’s ever questioned him or claimed he is a COMPLETE FUCKING DISASTER!

President Bush compared ignoring the threat of Al-Qaida to, “Watching a man walk into a bank with a mask and a gun and saying, ‘He’s probably just there to cash a check.”‘ Or tantamount to watching a Fucking Moron getting sworn into office as President and saying, “Eh, what could possibly happen? He’ll be voted out in Four Years, and things will return to Normal. He can’t do anything, he’s a Fucking Moron.”

Bush went on to blame, again completely out of character for him, the violence in Iraq on Al-Qaida never once mentioning the Sectarian Violence aka “Civil War.”

I want so much to believe him. We all know the “Civil War” cited by the Liberal Media is anything but “Civil”, and that they are only trying to scare us into supporting their evil Communist Plan to hijack our culture and kill God.

I don’t want to kill God, he’s a pretty Righteous Dude, much like President Bush, and we might need him one day if our team is down by 6 points and there’s less than a minute left in the game. Only Commies and Fags that hate football want to kill God. But I can’t help feeling disillusioned.

How can President Bush stoop so low? How? He doesn’t need to call upon the specter of Al-Qaida when he has the fear of Eternal Damnation in his back pocket. Let’s be honest, getting blown up by terrorists is nothing compared to spending Eternity locked in a room with Rosie O’Donnell and Paris Hilton a la’ Jean Paul Sartre’s “No Exit.”

Yet, President Bush done gone and done it. He played the Fear Card, and as he so eloquently put it, “The beans are out of the birds, and don’t come crying to me over a bag of two cats spilling stones on a hill of milk when Johnny comes marching home.”

Amen to that. Amen…


~ by fairlane on July 25, 2007.

4 Responses to “President Bush Reminds America, “Be Afraid, Be Very Afraid…””

  1. ROFL, you should be a speech writer for bush. You have his style of gibberish down pat!

    You really know how to write em! Nice job…

    The scientifically impossible I do right away
    The spiritually miraculous takes a bit longer

  2. Every Reich Wing Evangelical Fundamentalist (which Bush is), is a scociopath in training, because the only ultimate authority they answer to in their minds, is invisible, unproven, and strongly disputed.

  3. “Reich Wing Evangelical Fundamentalist” – I like it! Gotta write that description down some where…

  4. can’t. stop. laughing!!!

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