What If You’re a “Reverse Racist” and It’s “Opposite Day”?
I figured since Don Imus was in the news again rehashing this story may be appropriate. I warn you it isn’t pretty, and if you have any children please ask them to cover their ears.
Over the last month or so I’ve heard a number of complaints about “Reverse Racism”. I’ll admit this idea confused me at first. “Reverse Racism?” Is that anything like “Opposite Day?” If a person is a “Reverse Racist” does that mean he/she hates their own race, or does it mean they love the race they should actually hate or…?
I’m sure you can understand my confusion. And then a friend of mine explained it to me by recounting an incident that happened to him several weeks ago.
(I’m not including all the details because they are simply too heinous, but most of it is here)
“The other day my daughter and I were in an ice cream parlor trying to get well, some ice cream of course. We approached the counter and there was an Asian man waiting there to place his order. The “Ice Cream American” was in the back doing Lord knows what, but I’m sure it had nothing to do with Ice Cream. Probably doing drugs, you know how those “Ice Cream Americans” are. (Wink, Wink, Nod, Nod).”
“So, after waiting what had to have been 45-50 seconds I was ready to bloody explode. “Hey, do your Freemason on your own time lady!” I hollered. “Some of my ancestors didn’t come here and steal this land from some of my other ancestors so I could wait at a bloody counter all friggin’ day.” See, I impressed her with my knowledge of History, letting her know I’m no one to trifle with. That’s how you have to treat these people. And my daughter? Well, you can imagine how proud she was of her Papa.”
“Finally she comes out from the back, and before I can speak she asks, “Who’s next?” At first, I wasn’t sure if I heard her right or not. And then she said it again, “Who’s next?” And you know what happened? That’s right, that “Asian American” said, “I am.” And she waited on him. Yeah, I knew what was up. Sticking it to Whitey is what was up.”
“I’m sure you know where this is going, and oh let me tell you it did. After I got myself a double dip of Superman ice cream and my daughter a Hot Fudge Sundae, I stormed out mumbling under my breath until I reached the safety of my car. Hey, one can’t be too careful these days. Those “Ice Cream Americans” carry guns, and almost all of them are in gangs from what I heard on Rush Limbaugh’s show. And he should know, he buys his drugs from them. But buddy once I was in my car, I let her RIP, with a Capital “IP”.
“Unfortunately, the only result was that for the next week or so my daughter kept getting in trouble at daycare for cursing.”
Once he was finished I was flabbergasted. “Can you believe something like that would happen in this country?” he asked. I couldn’t even respond. I was truly shaken, and I just thanked God he and his daughter got out alive. Until he told me that story I never knew the horrors of “Reverse Racism,” but after hearing his terrifying tale I’ll never be the same.
I started thinking back on my life and all those times I waited in line behind Black Women, or Middle Eastern Men at the grocery store, and now I know exactly how Rosa Parks felt. “Damn you, you Racist Bastards! We Shall Overcome! You’ll Never Put Me at the Back of the Line Again!”
But it doesn’t end there.
Now that my eyes have finally opened to the Horrors of “Reverse Racism”, I see it everywhere. White people walking instead of having their own cars. My Brothers and Sisters, At Busstops?! White people being forced to serve people in restaurants while wearing a black tie and white shirt. Why not a white tie? Why does it have to be “BLACK?” We all know why. And just yesterday I saw the most terrible thing ever. A bunch of “African Americans” got out of a limo, apparently it was prom or something, and guess what? That’s right, the driver was half-white. He didn’t have to say a word. I knew which half of him was being forced to do the driving.
Yeah, I’m hip to the game now. My eyes are wide frig-gin’ open. So, all you “Reverse Racists” out there better watch out. You just keep right on burning your “Irish, German, French, Cherokee, Spanish, Scotch, Welsh, English” flags. Oh yeah, it hurts because I’m like “this” with my Homeland…Homelands…
I could probably find at least two of those countries on a map. I think I could at least. You know what I mean, Reversey? Yeah, I said it. What are you gonna do?
DOWN WITH REVERSEY!
You can’t hurt my people anymore than you already have. We’ve been through the wringer and we’re still here, and we’re not going anywhere because we’ve pretty much invaded every country on the face of the earth.
Better us than you!
Well, that’s about it for now. I have to go cook dinner. My one quarter Costa Rican maid quit yesterday. Said she “got a better job picking apples.” I bet she did. Probably an apple picking job a White Person used to have.