Jonestown Now Accepting Donations

Newt Gingrich declared he will run if his supporters can raise $30 million duckets.

Although I don’t particularly care for Newt Gingrich nor do I buy his “I’m Reformed, and Have Perspective” Routine, I must admit this plan is ingenious.

So, I’ve decided to begin taking donations. If we (And I really mean You) can raise $10 million, I promise to run as well.

I’m not sure where I’ll run (I have some friends in Italy), but I promise if we can meet this goal (And I know we can) I will most assuredly run.

If you’d like to make a donation, I have a friend in Nigeria you can contact;


Please make sure to have your bank account and social security numbers handy.



~ by fairlane on September 20, 2007.

14 Responses to “Jonestown Now Accepting Donations”

  1. Not another man with too many wives running again… what a joke the moral party is becoming.

  2. If you need a running mate, I will be glad to join you!

  3. I’d like to help, I really would, but I’m all tapped out. My good friend from Nigeria has already seen that I helped him a few years ago. Sadly, many more of his brothers continue to ask for my gracious help.

    All I can say is, I’m tapped out. And that goes for any retreads from the party that keeps giving to the rich, and taking from the poor!; (

    Someone should write a childrens story about a situation like that. Hmmm, or maybe they already have. I’m simply too dumbfounded to remember much of anything these daze! ; (

  4. so that is what those Nigerian emails are all about

  5. Spot for you right here in THE BIG ROCK CANDY MOUNTAIN known as the southwest side of panama city. It’s not that the cops have wooden legs, it’s that they don’t care you choose to indulge yourself as long as you don’t hurt anyone.

  6. All I can do is laugh. Really. Otherwise I’ll cry.

  7. You just couldn’t help it , couldya.

  8. I hope Newt gets his $30 million and pisses it on a losing campaign. Christ, I’d have a better chance of winning the republican presidential primary. Remember, whenever a republican wastes a dollar on a loser candidate, an angel gets his wings.

  9. As soon as I win the lottery, I’ll make a $10 donation. Promise.

  10. Check’s in the mail!

  11. Larry- They’ve been a joke for years, and apparently they have no desire to change course.

    At least they’re consistent.

    Phy- You would be my first choice without a doubt.

    Coffee- You’d think Democrats would have the next couple of elections signed, sealed and delivered with the morons the Wingnuts are choosing, but nope.

    It’s still a toss-up. How sad is that?

    And I understand being “tapped out,” me too. That’s why I’m holding a fundraiser.

    DCNY- Apparently so. I don’t think Newt’s going to get his 30 million that way, but what do I know?

    I said in 2004, “There is no way that Chimp is going to win again. Americans may be stupid, but we’re not that stupid.”


    LE- I feel you sister. Honestly, I don’t know what to do anymore.

    I do have a question, if you happen to return. What do Aussies call Wingnuts?

    David- It’s either this or I’m going to have to sling rocks for a living.

    Pissed- I like that image. I’ll try to keep it in mind. I was hoping Cheney would run. For a minute the Wingdings were suggesting it.

    If he won the nomination, and it was Cheney vs. Hillary an Independent might actually have a shot to win.

    DCup- I appreciate the pledge.

    If you up your donation to $10,000, you qualify for our “Silver Slugger Membership,” which means you receive a free gift.

    I’m not sure what the gift is, (Probably a half smoked Newport or an old comic book with a missing cover), but it’s yours to keep.

    Future- I knew I could count on you. Thanks buddy.

  12. Sorry but the Bank of America email warning me about my non-existent account got to me first. Very sad story.

    Seriously, I’ve been reading your comments on a couple of friends’ blogs (Future and Nvisible Woman – there are probably others) and decided to come over and say hello.


    Ann (aka granny)

    Is America Burning (my other blog – the link takes you to something quite different).

  13. Tell your man in Nigeria to stop emailing everyone, especially me.

  14. Ann- I figured I’d give it a try. Obviously someone falls for those emails because I get at least two per week.

    Thanks for visiting.

    Nvisible- He has a crush on you. I told him you were crazy, but he just won’t listen.

    My hands are tied. (Well, not right now they’re not because I’m typing).

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