Forget the Meaning of Life, What Is the Meaning of Blogging?
I’m convinced that Search Engine traffic is Pointless.
Last month, I think, I changed my Theme and wrote a post, “Jonestown’s Extreme Home Makeover: Ty Pennington Found Naked and Passed Out in the Basement.” Or something brilliant like that.
Since then I’ve had over 500 hits on that post, and why? What are people looking for? Are they interested in seeing how Jonestown’s makeover turned out?
They’re looking for Naked Pictures of that Hammer Packing, Emotion Twiddling Putz, Ty Pennington!
There are no Mother Fucking Pictures of Ty Pennington Naked here You BLUE ASSED MONKEYS!!
(Jonestown is #’s 2 and 3 if you search for “Ty Pennington Naked”)
I know Search Engines pad the stats, and that’s supposed to give me a Woody, and make me feel important and all. But you know what? It doesn’t. In fact, it annoys the crap out of me.
Search Engine Traffic (Unless you’re one of those bloggers trying to make money) is Useless.
Out of over 1200 comments I’d estimate maybe, maybe 50 of them came from people who stumbled upon Jonestown via the Search Engines.
Those people are not looking for blogs, they’re looking for Dick Pics of Ty Pennington or “Naked Boobies.”
Even the ones who are searching for an article (Something I wrote about Anti-Social Personality Disorder for example) come here, read the post, and then disappear into the Ether.
They rarely, if ever, leave a comment, they don’t “Link” and I’m fairly certain if they’re trying to understand why their husband is a Psychopathic Fuck Heel, they are not interested in reading about George Bush’s “Lime Disease” or Pickle’s Love Affair with Xanax. In fact, they might think I’m a Fucking Sociopath as well.
I started this blog at the end of April. At first, I thought blogging was “Gay” (Not homosexual “Gay,” but Stupid “Gay”). It wasn’t until mid June that I began making an effort to post consistently or to actually Visit other blogs.
Since then my “Traffic” has quadrupled, and I get several hundred “Hits” per day. Not to sound Ungrateful because I like my “Blog Buddies” and I enjoy our little exchanges, and visits etc.
But to be honest.
That ain’t cuttin’ the Mustard.
I want to be a Writer, and I can’t be a Writer if I’m spending so much time Blogging.
I have not worked on my book (Except maybe two or three days since April). because I’m using up all of my words so 250-300 people can read them.
Again, that’s nice. I do enjoy the Instant Gratification, and not having an Editor or any kind of Censor, but That’s Not Enough.
My book is more important than this blog.
I can’t even figure out what the purpose of blogging is. What in the Fuck does Blogging accomplish? I’ve participated in “Blogswarms,” and the world was so disinterested it didn’t even Yawn.
Am I converting Wingnuts to reason or at least getting them to Face Themselves? Shit No. I don’t even want them visiting here.
Isn’t this simply Masturbation? Ego?
Some of the most popular Bloggers refer to themselves in the Third Person, and send out Notices Reminding People Their Birthdays are Coming Up. What the Fuck? I don’t know you Mother Fucker, and you don’t know me. My name isn’t “fairlane.” I don’t live in Jonestown.
I’m not doing that.
I’m not writing this sentence, “So today fairlane…and then so and so says to fairlane…and fairlane was like…” I’m not Fucking doing it. (K, I’m not talking about you). And I’m not telling anyone about my birthday.
I hope the Readers I actually Care about, (And you know who you are because I visit your Blogs or I visit Blogs you visit or Miggedy Miggedy Mac) know I’m not Bitching at you or about you or against you or whatever.
Every week, at least once, I hover my Prompt over the Delete Blog Button, and think to myself,
“This is Fucking Stupid. Why am I doing this? What is the Point? I’m not getting paid, I’m not accomplishing anything. I’m not making a Proverbial “Difference.” I haven’t even posted anything worthwhile in two weeks. I’m sick of Sir Issac Chimplestein, and Wingnuts, and Liberals and Donna Summers. What the Fuck am I doing?”
What in the Fuck are We doing?
And who is it that wants to see Ty Pennington Naked? Are they women, men, both, are they children, Ted Haggard?
Are they Retarded?
Is Blogging Worthwhile?
Will I ever sleep again?
Does Chuck Norris wear a Rug?
Why do people eat Beets?
Who in the Fuck thinks Jerry Lewis is Funny, and why are they not in Gitmo?