I Just don’t…well..I do

Barry Max

journalism.jpgThe role model is officially dead.For me, it started with Earl Campbell.Not many of you, sans Kelso, will even remember or know who Earl Campbell is/was.

“Skoal Baby”

We wonder.

We wonder what happened to sports in America.

What happened to the role model?

The Answer:

I am going into a different font because I WANT TO SAVE a thousand word preface to my point…instead I will expertly manipulate the malleable gratify me now sensibility of the American Appetite.


Back to reality.

I was an asshole in school- I questioned everything.

I am the proud owner of a sub 3.0 grade point average.

I am proud because I never heard the term -” Dude quit Jewin’ me”- until I went to St. Mary’s

I am proud because my credit sucks ( at least on the grid).

I am proud because I never expected much more from people who are good at what they do.

What the fuck do they owe us?

We have not even delved into the steroids and the experimental stages of it’s effectiveness.

I wonder how many world records ?

Should I mention Clemens?

Oh yeah fairlane touched on that one.

Spin is magic.

Like Imus.

Who cares?


Spin is magic.

Like Imus.

Who cares?



~ by barrymax on December 27, 2007.

12 Responses to “I Just don’t…well..I do”

  1. Fuck it.

  2. It seems to me that there are always good and bad in sports. So many of those guys should never be considered role models. All they owe us is entertainment. So if they’re great players go watch them play and enjoy the game and find some other role model. A parent, a friend, a teacher or business person etc…

    On the other hand I don’t believe Clemens. Think about a guy that has had arm problems pitching into his forties. He probably needed some help.

  3. let them all cheat, have acne on their back and shrunken balls…..

  4. I’m with you d-cap. Cheating is a part of every game but chess (en’passant). The french got tired of (getting beat by travelers) cheating so they just made up a new move altogether.

  5. I loved Earl. He was smart. Got out before he was crippled.

    I never had “Role Models” either. I always thought people who had posters of their “Heroes” hanging on their walls were pussies.

  6. fairlane- actually
    i really like timothy leary

  7. There’s a great line in the movie “Fever Pitch” (probably the best line if you ask me) where a kid asks Jimmy Fallon’s character, Ben:

    “You love the Red Sox, but have they ever loved you back?”

    This is the line I use every time my kids go ape shit about this play or that from a game on TV. Now, if only I could learn to repeat it to myself.

    BTW, two words for you on the point of athletes as role models — Charles Barkley.

  8. Goddamnit, Dave. I left my comments on the other site which has SuziRiot’s infernal delay! Feel free to copy, paste and post here.

  9. In no particular order: Curt Flood, Muhammad Ali, Jim Bouton, Tommie Smith, John Carlos, Greg Lougainis, James “Bonecrusher” Smith, Barry Switzer, Dean Smith, Mike Marshall (baseball pitcher), Johnny Sain, Marvin Miller, Franco Harris, Emmitt Smith, Mario Lemieux, Barry Bonds, Kareem Abdul Jabbar, Bill Walton, John Daly, David Duval, Martina Navratilova, Todd Martin, Andre Agassi, Amy Alcott, Althea Gibson, Dick Allen, Curt Flood, Roberto Clemente, Roberto Duran, Thurman Thomas, Dave Meggeysey, Jerry Smith, Glenn Burke, Billy Bean, Billy Beane, Andy Messersmith, Dave McNally, Jean-Marc Bosman, Ricky Williams, Paul Goydos, Brad Faxon, Sheldon Kennedy, Laveranues Coles, Alan Page and many, many others too numerous to mention”

  10. To the above roster of “good/good” athletes, I add one of the “best/best”. I can’t believe I forgot him: JOHN McENROE

  11. Barry:

    If you ever find yourself in the wretched circumstances described in your excellent installments again, take some advice from your good friend Kelso: Read Pavlick/Root’s MODERN BRIDGE CONVENTIONS before finding your Spades or Dirty Hearts partner and make him do the same; and if your bankroll is big enough to deal policy, don’t be afraid to deal your “cut numbers” higher than the competition even if you pay 350/1 you are still making 2c on every $ you handle and dealing 350/1 as opposed to your competitors who’ll be dealing at 250/1 you will have every dime of Cut-Number business.

    By way of thanks for name-checking me re Earl Campbell.


  12. Dave- Let me clarify. There are many people I admire, and respect.

    Malcolm X
    Crazy Horse
    Sitting Bull
    Steve Albini
    Charles Bukowski

    I could go on and on.

    However, I think there is a difference between respecting/admiring/really liking someone, and idolizing them.

    The hero worshiping in America is disturbing to me. So many people wish they were someone else, and I’m fairly certain that’s impossible, which means there are a number of unhappy, disappointed people walking around with easy access to guns.

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