E for Egregious

567800-galactus_400.jpgTwo of my favorite people in all of Blogdom, Tengrain and Pissed in New York City, bestowed upon yours truly the little known, but highly Prestigious “E for Excellent” Award.

(Obviously they are both under the Influence of some Heavy Drugs, and are no longer in control of their Faculties, but I’m not one to Fuck with people on Crack. Those people are Fucking Lunatics, and Potentially Dangerous).


What I meant to say was, I am deeply Honored, Humbled, and a tad bit Horrified.

If a Care Bear gets a Rainbow every time Barack Obama sneezes, then one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse gets a Merit Badge every time I receive a Blogging Award (I’m going with Pestilence).

As part of my Punishment…I mean, one of the Obligations accompanying this Once in a Lifetime Achievement, is that I’m supposed to pass said Award (Thinly Disguised Link Scam) to Ten other Deserving Bloggers.

For Christ’s Sake, are you kidding me? Ten?

Fine, here goes. If you’re not on the list, blah blah blah blah, and I’m really Fucking Sorry (You best be thanking me).

1) I’ll get this one out of the way right off.

Scarlet at The Invisible Woman. Yes, we’re Engaged, Yes, she’s in line to be my Empress, and Yes, I’m biased, but she Fucking makes me laugh.

She has the same Sarcastic, Dead Pan Sense of Humor as I, and Goddamit the World Needs More People Like Us.

(I just hope her Boyfriend isn’t the Jealous Type).

2) Cowboy the Cat– I think he does drugs, but I don’t have any Concrete Proof other than the Drunken Comment he left here last Weekend.

But he’s Seems to be a Good Dude, and on The Intertubes, “Seems” is the Closest to a Sure Thing you’ll Find.

3) Samurai Frog at Electronic Cerebrectomy.

Frog has every Fucking thing you can think of on his blog. Movie Reviews, Celebrity Gossip, Naked Boobies, Political Commentary, and Like Me, he’s Sick of Fake Ass Liberals.

4) CJ at Current Jam (More than Just Jelly).

CJ uses the Sexiest Avatar I’ve seen thus far.

Oh, her blog…right.

CJ is Witty, Insightful, and when she needs to be, Caustic.

That’s a Good thing, there’s nothing wrong with Anger.

I know some think “Turning the Other Cheek” makes one Saintly, but after both Cheeks are Smacked Bloody, you just look Stupid… and Bloody.

5) Alright, I’ll try it again (You better respond this time).

Kelso at Kelso’s Nuts.

KMan is absolutely Fucking Certifiable, but he’s also Brilliant.

He’s the only person I know who writes posts that Require Homework to Understand.

Challenge, not unlike Anger, is Good.

6) I know she won’t accept, but I’m tagging her anyway.

Pissed Off Patricia at Morning Martini.

PoP, and I go back to my first couple of months in Blogdom. She supported me when Hank Died, Encouraged me that True Love is possible when I was Lamenting the Loss of the Ballerina, and is just an All Around Cool as the Other Side of the Pillow Type Person.

She also recently went through a Loss of her own, and although this is just a Pittance, I want her to know how much I appreciate Her.

7) Torrance at Raw Dawg Buffalo.

Another Smart as a Hell Type Cat.

Torrance is Airtight when it comes to History, and he isn’t about to Drink anyone’s Kool-Aid.

Isn’t it sad how Rare that is these Days?

And, He extended his Hand as a Gesture of Peace to a Racist Fucking Troll who used to Occasionally visit here.

8) Proud Progressive at some notes on living.

Yes, Proud’s an Obama supporter, and obviously that means they like Rainbows, and Care Bears, but that’s Cool.

Proud writes on a Myriad of Issues, and offers an interesting perspective on Subjects I know little about (Yes Mom, I’m ending the sentence with “about”).

9) Liberality at Liberality.

Another member of the “Kool-Aid? No Thanks” Generation.

She’s currently writing about all of the Delicious Chemicals we consume everyday in our Food.

Fucking Hell Man. Even being a Vegetarian in this Wasteland isn’t Healthy.

10) Dguzman at Impeachment and Other Dreams.

Perplexed, as am I, by all the Hubbub surrounding Obama.

A big T.S. Eliot fan (First poet I ever read), and just recently adopted Rachel Weisz.

There you go.

Addendum– In my haste to finish this post, I left out my team members without whom said Award would not be possible.

I apologize for this omission, and hope that they will forgive me.

It’s bad enough they work for Peanuts.

So, let’s give them the Props they Deserve.

Barry Max
Suzi Riot
Johnny Wingnut
M. Frederick Voorhees


~ by fairlane on February 25, 2008.

19 Responses to “E for Egregious”

  1. I posted a response on my own blog, but christ I’ll do it again here. This meant the world to me, buddy. It really did.

  2. Yes, I’m the 7,334,623rd person to say it, but that really looks like an Enron e. I hope none of you fuckers end up “dead” so you can live it up in Aspen, laughing at us little people.

  3. Randal: I was recruited by Enron when I was in b-school. I’ll tell the story someday. I did not accept their offer but to be fair it had more to do with other interests, not wanting to live in Houston, or hang around with Enron people than it did with the offer being a bad one.

    Fairlane: I’m really enjoying Torrance at RWB, btw. Thanks.

  4. Ah, thank you so much. Not for the little award dealie, but for what you said. I thought I was all cried out about losing Murphy but reading what you said made me realize I had a few more tears to shed. Again, thank you! You’re one of the all time best.

  5. Thanks; you’re one person I’m proud to get this award from.

  6. What happened to D-CUP’s post about DHS flying rules?

  7. KMan- I am in the process of heading your way as we speak.

    Torrance is very cool. I’m trying to expand my scope outside the “Liberal Blogosphere” because 1) Most Liberals seem to dislike me, and 2) I get bored.

    *I moved DCup’s post back to tomorrow. I’m trying to make sure we have at least one post per day. Sorry.

    Randal- I vow to remember the “Little People,” as I sip Merlot from the confines of my Ivory Tower.

    PoP- Right back at you Sister.

    Frog- I’m proud to offer it to you.

    But you better look out, if you keep it up, you’ll end up blacklisted.

  8. E is everybody loves Fairlane! but not how Scarlet loves Fairlane.

    A kool-aid toast to the boss.

  9. Fairlane & D-CUP: I actually managed to do a quick scan of the DHS piece and I was very intrigued and then I read a full AP article on warrantless wiretapping and I added one of my “certifiable” rants onto my last post. I can only imagine how much red I’ll be seeing when I get to read D-CUP’s piece carefully in the light of the AP article.

    I can’t imagine why liberals would dislike you, Fairlane! And why would you get bored reading the 13,897,917th post about how bad Bush and Cheney have been?

  10. Aw, thanks fairlane! *blushing* I’ll try to find time to Pass it Forward this week sometime.

  11. anyone who makes me think is someone I want to read and that is why I am here. thanks for the E man!

  12. You make me laugh, too, fairlane, and sometimes it feels like masturbation. Mental masturbation, I mean…? I’m flattered, though. I admire you and Jonestown and the fact that you like my work means a lot. So, thank you, dear fee-yonce. 😉 (DCup is right. E=Everybody loves fairlane.)

  13. thanks for the love hon, but its our country and brins and kindness are our weapons

  14. TYVM, my friend. I will have a problem passing it on to ten people though… I don’t think I even read ten weblogs.

    P.S. I don’t know any dealers anymore… So if you are, and happen to be in the Southern Illinois area… cowboythecat@hotmail.com

    I’m only kind of kidding.

  15. I’m back fairlane.
    like one of the borg I salvaged a keyboard.

    Stay tuned, I had to post a state of my union address

  16. Fairlane –

    If I’m one of your favorite people, it only confirms my theory that you are a misanthrope.

    Dude: you and the Jonestown crew deserve one of these things each day.



  17. What Tengrain said. And I like encouraging bad behavior. Someone has to.

  18. D-Cup– This award is for you, Dave, Suzi, MFV, Dashiell, and JWN as well.

    I should have put that in my post. All of you have helped turn this place into one hell of a blog, if I do say so myself.

    – I can’t imagine either. It blows my mind.

    Eh, it’s cool, I just find it interesting.

    CJ– Yeah, sorry about the “Passing it on” part. That’s what makes these things such a drag.

    But you are deserving nonetheless.

    Liberality– You are most welcome.

    Scarlet- You are one of the few people who makes me laugh not just once or twice, but consistently.

    You could get paid if you put your mind to it.

    Raw– You’re right, but those fuckers make my blood boil because they take advantage of the anonymity to run their mouths, and to spew their bile.

    That dude deserves a severe beat down.

    Of course, that’s probably what he got, which explains why he’s the way he is.

    You are a better man that I.

    Cowboy– No worries about passing it on, I kind of figured some people would have difficulty.

    I much prefer the “awards” going to people who actually deserve them instead of giving them out just to give them out.

    I hope you’re kidding man, that’s a serious bust.

    Dave– Good to see you my brother. I was getting worried my Obama post pissed you off, and you said, “Fuck that cracker ass cracker.”

    I look forward.

    Ten– I don’t so much hate people, as I tend to dislike them. No, that’s not it, I have a complete intolerance for people I consider to be stupid.

    Unfortunately, there seem to be a lot of stupid people wandering around these days, and as that comedian said (What’s his name), “Stop making that guy.”

    You are not that guy by any stretch of the imagination.

    Of course that could all change when I show up at your house, looking for a place to crash next time I’m in Cali. My “Hook Up,” got married, and husbands, not unlike “Liberals,” tend to dislike me.

    Pissed– I don’t need encouragement. It’s all natural baby.

    But don’t think I forgot about your drink offer. I’m not a huge fan of NYC, but it’s been a while since I took a long car ride, and you never know.

  19. You are too kind , i love this place. This blog all the stuff you guys dig deep into and your perspectives. Hey Fairlane at least you ended a sentence in your descriptor of my blog..thats more than i do sometimes..Things have been so hectic here AIN”T barely got time to post..but its true about the care bears the “BEARS” in my life couldn’t be more caring…but thats another story for another day.
    Thanks for the recognition..It means a lot to me. Cheers you all !

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