Jonestown Delivers a Public Announcement for the Wingnuts
Add It Up
“Incuriousness is not a Sign of Virtue. It’s a Cry for Help.”
Me, Pretty Much Every Fucking Day
“Facts” are IMPORTANT!
The Earth is not 6000 years old. Hell, John Mc Thuselah is Older Than That.
Anthropological Global Warming is Real. There is no “Controversy.” Dismissing the findings of Actual Scientists based on the Yammerings of a Hack Science Fiction Writer, is the Epitome of STOOPID. Education Matters, and Rightly So. Would you want Michael Crichton designing the Airplane on which you, and Your Family were about to Fly? Of course not, so, Please, Stick to What You Know. Making Toast.
“Catastrophic Plate Techtonics/Runaway Subduction,” is UTTER NONSENSE. The Continents did not Separate in a matter of Months, and, again, Humans Did Not Co-Exist With Dinosaurs (Unless of course, you count C-Word living with Mc Thuselah). When Scientists accuse You of living in a World of Make Believe, answering that Criticism BY MAKING SHIT UP, only adds to the Belief that You People are Fucking Deranged.
There is Virtually No Difference between a “Biblical Literalist,” and some Native sitting in a Loin Cloth, Eating a Monkey. Both of you believe the World is Controlled by Magical Creatures who Punish, and/or Reward you based on whether or not you Follow a Bunch of Arbitrary Rituals, which are Contradictory, and Completely Illogical. I’m fairly certain, if there is a Supreme Being, he’s More Intelligent, and has a Better Temperament than the Assistant Manager at Shop-N-Save who’s on Probation for Domestic Battery. Get your Kids Vaccinated, and Join the 21st Century.
Chuck Norris, is a FAG!
Same for Larry Craig, Ted Haggard, and Mark Foley.
Oh, and Pretty much Anyone who “Dedicates” their Life to Fighting the Gay Agenda. If a guy writes 10 books about “Queers,” or Delievers Speech after Speech on the Subject, that, in Law Enforcement, is called, A CLUE! The only people worrying about Homosexuals are, H O M O S E X U A L S.
“Free Market Capitalism,” like Communism, is a Fantasy. Human Beings are Incapable of Practicing an Ideology (And capitalism, without a Doubt, is an Ideology) without Fucking It Up in Some Way. I offer the Bailout on Wall Street as Indisputable Proof. I know they didn’t “Practice It as It Was Written,” but you know, that’s the Same Fucking Thing Leftists say about the Soviet Union, and China. Enjoy it while you Still Can.
You Cannot Reduce or Eliminate Abortions by Banning Birth Control! Goddamn, how STOOPID are you People?!! If you don’t want Billy knocking up Little Bristol, Get Her on the Pill, and make sure he knows how to Wrap His Jimmy. Oh, and Encouraging Teenage Marriage should be considered Child Abuse. Sixty Percent of Married Teens end up Divorced within Fifteen Years. That means Home Schooled, Non-Birth Control Using Bristol will, more than likely, be Divorced, with Six Kids, by the Time She’s Thirty-Two. The Majority of Adults don’t know how to make Marriages Work. Why in the Fuck would you think a Couple of Dumbass Kids Do?
Vaginas, and Penises like Each Other, A LOT! You’re not going to Stop It.
Country Music, in its Current State, SUCKS! So does NASCAR. Watching grown men drive in circles for Hours on end, is not called Entertainment. It’s called Mental Retardation.
People who use the phrase, “Pull Yourself Up By Your Bootstraps,” should be Tortured, and then, Publicly Executed. The only people I’ve ever met who use that Phrase can barely Pull Up Their Own Fucking Socks. Look, if you have Duct Tape holding your Car Together, you probably shouldn’t be Giving People Advice about how to Live. Obviously, you Have No Fucking Clue.
Anne Coulter is not “Hot.” God Almighty, the Bitch looks like a Fucking Ghoul. Give up the Milwaukee’s Best, and move away from the Meth Lab. Your Brain is Damaged.
Speaking of Meth Labs. If you live in a County where Meth Labs outnumber Doctor’s Offices, you should Keep Your Fucking Mouth Closed, Period. Shut It! Seriously. Especially when you Talk Shit about a certain City that Pays 60% of the State’s Taxes, despite the fact, that said City is home to only 25% of the State’s Population. I think you have Plenty to Worry About in Your Own Backyard there, Cletus.
If your name is Cletus, Christ. Never Mind.
If a person is Better Educated, Better Looking, More Intelligent, and More Successful with Women than You, that doesn’t make them an “Elitist.” That makes you, a LOSER.
This Post is Dedicated to the Hard Working Men, and Women on My Blogroll.