Technorati, Not Unlike the Wingnuts, SUCKS!


I’m going to keep this brief.

I just have a couple of questions, and then I’ll relinquish the floor to anyone interested.

1. Why is Technorati such a Piece of Shit?

Here’s my Beef-

Six months ago, Jonestown’s “Authority” was 107 with over 400 blog reactions.

But today, I happen to wander over and discover-

Jonestown- Authority (7)- 43 blog reactions.

What the Fuck?!!

Seriously, what the Fuck?

I know, I know, if people don’t refresh their links every 180 days, blah blah blah blah blah.

But are you telling me 100, ONE HUNDRED, people have failed to Refresh their Outgoing Links, even a Single FUCKING Time in the last Six Months?




That’s not what Happened.

What Happened Is-

Technorati is operated by MORONS.

Don’t believe me?

Fill out a Support Ticket, and see how long it takes them to respond.

Hope you Enjoy…Long…Fruitless…Waiting

The Simple Truth-

Technorati is Incapable of Doing what they say they Can Do

2. Why does this matter?

Okay, in the Big Scheme, Fuming over Technorati’s  Ineptitude is Pointless, and possibly even Narcissistic.

But, Come On, people.

It takes work to build relationships in the Blogosphere (Especially when you curse the way I Mother Fucking Do).


Knowing who’s linking to your blog makes it easier to find Like Minded People without having to Trudge Through Ten Tons of…


There’s nothing wrong with Caring.

In fact, if people didn’t care, they wouldn’t have Blogrolls.

Hell, they wouldn’t have Blogs.

The people concerned only with “Personal Expression,” purchase a nice journal, and a set of pens.

We Put Our Shit Out There Because We Want People To Read It!!!!!!

Technorati is supposed to Help Us.

Instead, they randomly wipe out months, if not longer, of work, and Glibly Respond (If they respond at all)

Blogs that don’t refresh their links every 6 months are dropped from your Authority.

I know that, Asshole.

The problem is, just in the last week, I’ve personally witnessed Five Bloggers post their Entire Blogroll (Just to combat this kind of Bullshit), and, yet, not one of them is among the “43 Blog Reactions” to Jonestown.

Yes, I’m positive Jonestown is on their List.

I’s got bookreadin’, don’tcha know.

Are you Feelin’ Me, you Overly Medicated, Chromosomally Challenged Cluster Fuck!!

That’s all I have.


~ by fairlane on August 13, 2009.

11 Responses to “Technorati, Not Unlike the Wingnuts, SUCKS!”

  1. Technorati is now irrelevant, and only got worse over time. They were practically given the Franchise, and they squandered it – you can thank the new CEO idiot for that.

    But don’t worry, friend, they don’t matter any more.

  2. Hi fairlane;

    I agree with your post 100%, along with the disruptions of their move, they screwed up what may have been a good thing.

    Personally I don’t credit them with traffic I receive to date, I think the lion’s share by far is from WordPress and search engines.

    I know the feeling watching a ranking decimated due to the six month link refresh bull shit 🙂

  3. Building relationships? You gay homersexual patchouli bastard.

  4. Heh. I was at 207. That was nuts too…but people liked being listed and did blogroll me. But that was where it mostly stayed. 180 days they never clued into my updates despite going to 2 separate services to get things going.
    The Existentialist Cowboy and I have have commiserated over their idiocy for ages.
    13. 26 on this blog back down to that when they started losing it – again.

  5. It is a piece of crap, and so I stopped looking at it, ever. It changed hourly on me late last year, jumping hundreds of points, dropping hundreds of points; MPS either has thousands of readers or 12.

    It’s not worth losing sleep over.



  6. I agree with Randal and Ten.

    I never check it anymore due to its being so poorly administered.

    I didn’t know it was the CEO’s fault though.



  7. Alan- To be honest, I’m not sure Technorati ever was relevant.

    Out of 130 plus thousand visits, I think maybe 50 came from Technorati.

    I think Technorati convinced people it was relevant, and made a shit load of money off advertising.

    Ichabod- Good to see you.

    See comment above.

    No good for traffic.

    Randal- When I said “relationship,” I meant to say something else, but at this moment, what it is escapes me.

    I’m sure it was far more masculine, and smelled like broken in leather.

    opit- I’m not sure anyone actually works there.

    Ten- No, not worth losing sleep over, but it is frustrating. It takes time to do all that bullshit.

    Suzan- I have it on good “Authority” that former members of the Bush administration are now running Technorati.

  8. i gather that the 5 or so readers i have left (due to my ‘negative’ posting and much cursing i suppose) have better things to do than remember to refresh their links and whatnot. i was in the hundreds at one point and if i kept posting 10 times a day- i may still be there instead of the 30 technorati says i am. whatever traffic they can bother to generate these days i’ll take. but i won’t hold my hand on my ass waiting for that to happen…

  9. In my experience, a Technorati affiliation has been somewhat unhelpful when it came to providing any usable data regarding my limited infamy within a global network of ideological perverts – and if I am logged out automatically by them one more time for some undiscernible reason the widget goes in the trash along with the bookmark, like I could give a fuck about some nebulous ‘claim’.
    Almost 100% of my initial visitation comes from search engines or mailed links anyway…The plight of the mildly controversial, I suppose.


  10. Fuckorati can kiss my ass! Mine wasn’t working right for several months, in that it wasn’t changing at all, and then I bought my url from blogspot and when I went to claim it at Fuckorati central, I never could get it to find it again. I had my tech requests go unanswered and one was even returned to sender (me). Then, I had the same problems with FluffPo, and I hadn’t even changed that url, or anything.

    Sooo, I dropped the mother fuckers, and you know what? No difference.

    I did like being able to see who linked to me, but my statcounter deal tells me the same thing, and the only other thing I miss was the egoboosting, but it was counter-acted commensurately in the negative fluctuations, anyway.

  11. I guess the ones not working for Sex, JPMormoned or BoAssholes prolly need the work.

    And the results speak for themselves.


    Suzan- I have it on good “Authority” that former members of the Bush administration are now running Technorati.

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